Striker Light - Wenger Moves for Legend...
In a shock move Arsene Wenger is considering an audacious summer move for Gladiators front man and former Match of the Day thinks-he's-funny guy Ian ‘Ian Wright, Wright, Wright’ Wright. Sir Wenger has long-lamented on the lack of "Foxes in his Boxes" and thinks the TV celebrity and former West Ham goal-getter could "do a job". Wenger is keen to fill the manky, unkempt hole once semi-filled by plug-earred, sour-faced scousebag Franny Jeffers...

When asked about Ian ‘Wrighty’ Wright's recent debut on Sky One's "Gladiators" Le Boss replied, typically "I did not see it..." but went on to mention that Wrighty's energy, racism, childish sulkiness and unwavering Arsenal bias in the MOTD pundits box was what inspired the Frenchmen to consider approaching Sky TV's oldest, newest, hottest coolest property...

Ian ‘So Good they Named him Thrice’ Wright was unavailable for comment yesterday but his agent commented "Ian has got the potential to be the new Richard Blackwood or Dwain Chambers, that's what we're dealing with here, got to go, got another call coming in…"

More later punter(s)...